Why I Won’t be KILLING IT, or Myself, in 2018
I’m sure I’m not alone in feeling the pressure once the clock strikes midnight on New Years Eve. The pressure that washes over us like a tsunami is insane. As Big Ben strikes Twelve, it’s like a big magic hand comes along and slaps us in the face and fuelled by our local high street’s very best Prosecco, we commit to being better versions of ourselves, to the thinner, to be successful, to KILL IT! Well I tell you what, I won’t be KILLING IT, or myself, in 2018 or any other year after that!
The thing with social media and the blogging world generally is that you can find yourself being slowly taken by the digital tidal wave, getting dragged into that “you must post photo’s of your breakfast” mindset. And woe betide if you miss a posting! Call the Social police if you miss a slot and lose 1 follower who probably wasn’t really following you anyway. If you follow my social media you might notice that I dip in and out. It’s not because I dislike it, on the contrary, I bloody love social media! I do pretty much everything online yet it can become tiresome, the same old shizzle everywhere you look! I get to the point where I need to overt my eyes for a while and then I’m like ‘hey, I’ve had a wee break but I’m good to go, here’s a picture of my burnt toast!’ and guess what… nobody died while I wasn’t killing it . The t’internet didn’t stop working. Mark Zuckerberg didn’t retire and shut shop whilst I was off composing myself.
So what’s with the pressure to KILL IT? Since when did we need to be the prize winner at everything? Since when was the taking part not good enough? The irony is that we teach our children that winning isn’t the point, being there, being present, taking part is the point…. enjoying it is the point. Yet, as an entrepreneurial mother, I’m actually setting them an example that says the complete opposite! I’m subconsciously telling them to do what it takes, don’t conform to the 9-5, work your bloody hardest or there’s no point being present at all! Without realising it, I’m teaching my children to kill it and that comes with stress and pressure and the fear of failure and oh! the guilt of it all….and this is why I have come to the conclusion that in 2018, I will not get dragged along with the tidal wave of hustlers and killers and because for me, it wrings the bloody neck out of the joy which just gets completely washed away in the tsunami. I quit my corporate job for this very reason and to be able to work when I want and how I want and so far, almost 4 years in, it’s going pretty good thank you very much! However, as the saying goes, ‘the show must go on’ so I will be doing…
Marketing yourself is essential when you’re a one woman band and yes you do need to get out there. You don’t however need to be on every social platform all of the time. If you were, you’d be more like to kill yourself than kill it, trying to be someone everywhere just doesn’t work! While social media is not a one-size-fits-all thing, you do have the freedom to find your best fit. Personally I like Twitter and I dip in and out of Instagram with it’s all pretty, staged photos but to be honest all the following and unfollowing is a head wrecker! But I do need to get off my Insta soap box because it’s where all the brands hang out, you know, the cool people who might want to pay me some cash at some point – but that’s not to say that I need to put pressure on myself to get a KILLER insta account anytime soon. With all the algorithmic changes happening across the social spectrum, its important to try new ways of doing things – you can’t just stop but you also don’t have to go grey over it!
Now. Stories. Stories I like. Going ‘Live’ I hate but Stories I like. Why do you think that is? Because Stories are shorter or because you don’t actually know who’s watching until after the fact? I dunno. Anyway, I can deal with Insta Stories and that’s definitely on my list of not-killing-it things for 2018. So when I’m kicking back enjoying the not-killing-it vibe, what will I be doing this year?
Well. I will most certainly be working my new business. Oh yes. Like every good Del Boy before me, there is a new venture on the horizon. I will write more about that later as I’m only just crossing t’s and dotting i’s and whilst I’m not superstitious at all, I’d rather leave the cat happily in the bag for the time being.
I know, I keep going on about it but I am soooo in love with my camera at the moment! Its the only thing, THE ONLY THING, that I have or do that’s just mine. Do you know how crazy that sounds but when I’m not mumming, working, writing, cooking, slaving, to have this one thing that only *I* know how to do is brilliant!! And I’m getting pretty ok at it if I do say so myself. Taking photos of the children is my happy place and to be able to keep them, in their gappy smile, wonky fringed state forever is utter bliss for me. So, yeah, I’ll be doing lots of that in 2018 fo’sure!
One With Nature
Hugging trees. I’m going to be doing a lot of that this year. My mum bought me an annual National Trust membership for my birthday in August and I plan to use the heck out of it! I love having a good old nose in the old houses and Max loves the scenery and the gardens while the children can roam and play. I definitely want to get outdoors more this year! Which brings me to the tulips! There is a reason that I posted beautiful colourful photos of tulips, because it reminds me that I want to go
to Amsterdam this year. I’ve wanted to go for the last few years when the tulips are in bloom but I’ve not yet made it – this year, I’m going and that’s that!
So you see, all these buzz words like killing it, hustle and slay are just that, they’re only words. I understand the posting toast debacle, showing the real you, photos of your new “Gratitude” journal neatly placed next to your elaborately quoted coffee mug that just happens to be sitting in view of the Fortnum & Mason wicker hamper. I do, I get it. We all want a bit better than we have but 2018 is the year to be HONEST. The year to catch your breath and realise that actually, you’re doing a really amazing job! I think it’s time to pause the extra-ordinary and play the ordinary.
So next time you tell yourself “I’m killing it”, ask are you really? Or are you just doing the job the very best you can whilst juggling life and trying to remain sane – nowt wrong with that!